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Psychology Proves a Link Between Self Esteem and Father Daughter Bonds

Psychology Proves a Link Between Self Esteem and Father Daughter


Girls tend to favor their dad while boys tend to latch on to their mother. These patterns are something observed throughout history. A daughter needs to have a healthy relationship with her father. Psychologists have now proven that it’s essential for the child to develop these relationships to form positive self-esteem.

Why is this relationship between a father and daughter so important? First, little girls all see daddy as their hero and rightfully so. He is the first male figure in her life that she depends on. A daughter develops a relationship with her parents early on as they are her entire world.

Traditionally throughout history, here what happened. Mothers played a pivotal role as the nurturing and caring one. However, a father’s role was just as important. He made sure his daughter was safe and was eager to protect her. These vital roles were based on historical perceptions. Of course, modern parents can cross over into the other position or serve as both.

It’s essential for a child to feel a bond with both parents. However, psychologists have found that when the father-daughter relationship struggles early on, it can cause many emotional challenges. Additionally, a skewed view of dad can cause problems with dating and even marrying a man.

The Formative Years

The father-daughter relationship develops around two years of age. Since the formative years are defined as ages 2-4, this male role needs to be in her life. The bond that develops in these years will last a lifetime.

When a child is going through their formative years, they need both the female and male role. The toddler is asking internal questions such as:

  • Am I okay to be me?
  • What can I explore today?
  • Will mommy or daddy play with me?
  • Who will feed me?

They learn quickly which parent will do specific roles in their care. For instance, if mom feeds the child, then when they are hungry, they will go to mom. However, if mom isn’t around, then they learn dad is a backup. Additionally, they learn the roles that dad plays in their life.

Forming a Sense of Independence

As your child is growing and learning to be more self-sufficient, they use repetition. It’s how they form a sense of independence. They find comfort in knowing that daddy will fix their doll’s arm or take care of their bumps or scrapes.

Safety and security are a significant factor to a young child, especially as they’re learning to walk and talk. Many changes are going on in their lives, and they need the united force of their parents to make them feel safe.

Should dad be demanding with the child and push them too far, it can cause them to doubt their new skills. Both parents must allow a child to use the repetitive nature that comes along during the formative years as it’s essential for growth. Your child needs everything in place so they can master their environment.

Psychology reveals the behaviors that cause children to grow up to become narcissists.

Avoiding Self-Doubt

When a child has a skewed father-daughter relationship, it can cause self-doubt to occur. Doubt can cause a child to place limits on themselves as they grow. These kids usually make derogatory statements such as:

  • I’ll never be good enough to try out for the school play.
  • Everyone else is better than me.
  • I can’t do that spelling bee because I am afraid I will mess up.

The self-doubt that starts in the formative years either from a poor father-daughter relationship or other outlying factors can turn into low self-esteem. When children make such comments as listed above, some say that they are shy or afraid to explore things.

The real problem is that the child is making these statements hoping that someone will give them advice on the matter. A daughter desperately longs for the approval of her parents, and she doesn’t feel free to try new things without a gentle nudge in the right direction. A child uses the rules they’ve learned early on to set the patterns for life.

If a father doesn’t allow children to explore, experiment, and be adventurous, they won’t be curious or welcome experimentation in life.

Negative Patterns Follow Throughout Life

When a parent sees an issue with the child’s esteem, they need to correct the dynamics. If these issues are allowed to flourish, they will be a constant problem well into adulthood. The father-daughter bond is essential, but any negative patterns from childhood must be corrected to change their self-doubting nature.

A self-doubting child turns into an adult who is afraid to go for a job promotion as they are fearful; they can’t keep up with the work. Many are so scared to try anything new or move too far away from their homestead. Girls that don’t have a good father-daughter dynamic may be scared to do anything even in adulthood that might be a little risky.

A father must be encouraging his daughter. They should motivate them to try new things and be adventurous, and they should be on the sidelines, cheering them on in life. Remember, they are going to make errors, but you just need to be there to pick up the pieces. Mistakes are a part of life and how you learn.

Both mothers and fathers need to be supportive of their children as they grow and make blunders. When required, offer advice, but make sure you are a support system and a shoulder to cry on.

Here are 15 rules of etiquette every parent should teach their kids.

Setting The Stage for a Happy Life

Children are a product of their environment. Have you ever heard the statement, “She has daddy issues?” While it’s natural for a girl to want to marry someone like her dad, if the father-daughter dynamic was toxic, it causes problems.

On the flip side, a boy who never had a mother be there for him can have issues in trusting women in life. The most significant gift that a dad can give to their daughter is to teach them respect. Respect is not something that comes freely as it must be earned.

You can show your daughter the true meaning of respect by treating her mother and other siblings well. Being that constant positive in her life sets the stage for how her husband and sons treat her in the future. She will know what to expect and won’t settle for anything less.

Mothers and fathers can both put the wheels in motion for healthy patterns. Girls tend to gravitate to what is familiar to them. It doesn’t matter if her father was a positive or negative force in her life; she will look towards comfortable things.

Being a father is one of the biggest job titles that come with the most significant rewards, so dads have a lot of pressure not to mess up.

Promoting Father-Daughter Bonding

Some dads have a hard time relating to their daughter, as it’s easier to relate to males. However, it would help if you found a way to bridge the divide and do things that your daughter likes to do. For instance, take her to a movie and out to ice cream.

No one is going to refuse a good flick and a sweet treat. Most cities have those daddy-daughter dances around Valentine’s day. While it may be out of your comfort zone, you must go for the sake of your daughter. The memories you will make with her will be priceless.

Try building something together, and you may find that your little girl has a liking to power tools. You can take a cooking class and then use your skills to create dinner for the family. Many girls love to shoot hoops or take a drive in the evening with the music blasting.

When you think about it, you and your daughter would like to do tons of things together. It doesn’t matter what you do, just make sure you let her be a part of the selection process, so you validate her opinions.

Final Thoughts on the Father Daughter Relationships and Developing Healthy Esteem

Thankfully, it’s never too late for you to work on your relationship with your daughter. Even if you weren’t there for her in her formative years because of divorce or work, you could be there for her now. Did you know that women who grow up and have positive relationships with their parents are generally more confident and well-rounded in life?

Women with confidence choose better partners, have emotionally healthy ways to deal with stress and drama, and often have well-balanced relationships with both males and females. The joy of raising a good child is one of the most significant accomplishments you can have in life.

It’s imperative to work on your father-daughter relationship as it means everything to raising well-adjusted girls that don’t have “daddy issues.”

Lifestyle

10 Long Distance Date Ideas for Couples to Build Bonds

10 Long Distance Date Ideas for Couples to Build Bonds


They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, primarily when you long distance date, your love. Perhaps you swooned over stories about lovelorn ladies writing to their beaus who were soldiers overseas. These heartfelt situations make some of the best romantic movies.

Some of the most common distant relationships still involve deployed military personnel and their lovers or spouses. Studies reveal that regular communication is vital to keep the bonds of love healthy while another partner is away. They found that hearing each other’s affirmation of love helped them cope with the difficulty of being apart.

Another familiar way that couples must love from a distance is while attending college. These couples realize that their education is essential to their future, so they sacrifice proximity for successful home life in the long run. For others, a lucrative out-of-town job may keep their partner away for days or weeks.

The temporary separation may be even more challenging for the partners who are away because they are homesick and lovesick at the same time. For centuries, love letters were the glue that kept distant relationships together. Today, computer applications like Zoom and Skype provide couples a chance to chat face-to-face in real-time.

How to Bring Your Hearts Closer When Your Lover Is Away

No one said that long-distance relationships are easy. It involves patience, understanding, and a lot of communication. However, relationship experts warn against constant contact because it could be perceived as controlling or desperately needy.

Are you cultivating a long-distance date night with your person? It’s not easy to be away from the one who holds your heart. However, you can still boost the romance factor in your relationship with long distance date ideas.

1. Watch a Movie Together

What were the movies you watched together when you first started to date? Surprisingly, not every couple bonded over romantic comedies or drama. Many found common ground while watching slap-stick comedy, adventure, and even thrillers.

Why not choose a flick from your favorite genre and watch it together on Zoom or Skype? Bring the total movie theater experience and suggest that your partner also makes some popcorn and snacks. Sit back, relax, and revel in each other’s company as you watch a beloved movie or pick a new one to view.

2. Have a Dinner for Two

Many treasured dates are spent around the table enjoying excellent food, drink, and romance. Food has been the language of love since the beginning. Even a lavish plate of delicacies and a vintage wine doesn’t taste the same when you dine alone.

You needn’t forego dinner reservations just because your sweetheart is miles away. Recreate the ambiance for dinner pour Deux over the computer, complete with candles and roses. Both of you dress in your most beautiful, have your preferred meal delivered, and dine together via Facetime.

3. Play Your Favorite Board Game or Video Game

Thanks to modern technology, you can play videos with other gaming enthusiasts from around the world. You can see the gaming scene, but specific programs allow you to see and talk to the other players. If you and your distant amour are gamers, it makes an ideal long distance date.

Ok, what if you both prefer traditional board games over high-tech video ones? Use a face-to-face program to play many of the classic games you love. These virtual games are just as easy to play as the real ones, and you can enjoy quality time with a little friendly competition.

4. Enjoy a Beautiful Sunrise or Sunset

What is it about the heavenly bodies that mesmerize us or instantly put us in a romantic mood? Think of the sweet whispers of love you’ve shared while gazing at a breathless sunrise or sunset. The minutes between dusk and dawn have always had a magical quality that entrances lovers.

It’s comforting to know that wherever your darling is, you can see the same sun, moon, and stars. If you are both in different time zones, you can schedule a long distance date to revel in a sunrise or sunset. Even if you are a day behind, you can watch the sunrise while it sets where your lover is and wish each other good morning or sweet dreams.

5. Get Cozy with a Good Book

The famous author C.S. Lewis proclaimed that when we read, we know that we are not alone. If work, school, or military deployment has taken your partner to faraway places for a while, you know about lonely. A long-distance date idea you might consider is sharing a good book.

Think of it as a book club for two. Choose a title, get a copy for both of you, and then read and discuss it during your virtual date. Do you have a panache for poetry? Why not learn to each other from your favorite poet or share some sonnets of love.

If you love to read, you probably enjoy writing, too. Have you ever thought of penning a short love story with you and your partner as the main characters? You might also try your hand at writing a heartfelt poem dedicated to your darling.

6. Share a Night of Romance under the Stars

Imagine lying with your lover on the lawn, caressed by the moon under a blanket of stars. Have the two of you ever relaxed in a hammock on a balmy evening and wished on a shooting star? Stargazing is a heavenly way to spend your long-distance date.

Bring your computers outside and use your video camera to give each other a glimpse of the night skies as it appears on each other’s side of the world. Try to trace the constellations as you delight in your lover’s company. Imagine you both are whisked away into the Starry Night by Van Gogh during this extended distant date.

7. Bring Out your Inner Artists

Since nobody has figured out if life imitates art or the other way around, we can assume that the two are intimately connected. Are you or your distant sweetheart a budding artist? You needn’t be Leonardo Da Vinci to channel what inspires you onto paper.

While it’s attractive to use various mediums for your art, a simple pencil and a sheet of paper will do. Have fun on your virtual long-distance date and hone your artistic skills together. Have you ever considered posing for each other to draw romantic portraits? These inspiring drawings can be as intimate as you like since they are for your eyes only.

8. Brainstorm and Daydream Together

Some of your fondest memories may have been the times you spent planning your future as a couple. Perhaps you lay on a blanket on the beach listening to the waves thunder their approval of your dreams. A long distance date may not have been on your plan, but you can still embrace the hopes and dreams that sparked your love.

While chatting live on your long-distance date, continue to share your dreams. You might need to adjust the goals and timing a bit, but they are still yours. Keep a journal together of your aspirations, and revisit them when you long to be together in person.

9. Fall in Love Again with Your Favorite Music

Just about every couple has an enduring song they claim as their own. Usually, this song invokes a particular time and place when you first heard it. Maybe it was played the first time you danced together or a song from your wedding.

Bring the magic of music into your time together and listen to some of your favorite songs. If you like to sing, you might surprise your distant mate with a karaoke version. If you are instrumentally talented, you can play the piano or guitar while you serenade each other.

10. Surprise Gift Exchange

Have you ever bought a gift for your lover just with the thoughts of the look on his face when he opens it? Unfortunately, you can’t have the same satisfaction when you send your gift through the mail, or can you? If you can resist the temptation and wait, you can open surprise gifts as a long distance date idea.

Send each other something thoughtful that each will love, and it needn’t be expensive. Are you a crafty person? Why not create a beautiful item by hand rather than to buy something? Handmade gifts are often more treasured than something from the department store.

On your face-to-face long distance date, open the gifts simultaneously to see the reactions. For some of these virtual gift exchanges, you both may consider gifting a humorous gag item for a memorable laugh. It doesn’t need to be a birthday or a holiday to send your special someone a gift that says you long to be with them again.

Final Thoughts of Keeping a Connection with These Long Distance Date Ideas

Modern technology and telecommunications have made virtual dating a reality. Whether your partner or spouse is in another city or across the globe, try some of these long distance date ideas. When you are in love, time and distance don’t matter.