There’s nothing better than spending eternal bliss with someone you love. Sadly, many marriages end in divorce. Some people hold on much longer than they should and only make themselves and others miserable.
Is Your Marriage Worth Saving?
How do you know if your marriage is worth keeping, and has the newlywed bliss worn off and has turned into a bitter battle for survival? Here are some tips to help you decide if your marriage is worth saving.
1. You Still Feel Butterflies When You See Them
Life and marriage are hard. When you bring two people together, the wedded bliss will quickly fade as the cares of life take over. However, you know there is still a fire burning if you feel those butterflies.
When they call you or walk into the room, do you still feel like a teenager melting in their arms? While it takes more than feelings to sustain a relationship, you must have a connection that can withstand life’s trials. If there are still any feelings at all left, then you can rekindle the fire that once burned strong.
2. They’re the One That You Want To Be With
When the world comes crashing down around you, your spouse is still the one you want to be with for the remainder of your natural life. When danger is all around you, you look to them for comfort. If you always find yourself picking up the phone to tell them about your day before you get home, call them on lunch, and text throughout the day, there is still an incredible connection that many people don’t have.
3. You Never Miss an Anniversary or Birthday Celebration
It’s always the little things that make a relationship unique. If you still celebrate all your anniversaries, birthdays, and plan unique gifts and getaways for each other, then it shows there are love and care still there.
Many guys and girls could care less about celebrating those little things like the anniversary of your first kiss. If you find someone who can remember all the small details that are so important, they are worth holding on to.
4. You Miss Each Other
If you were to go away for a weekend with your friends, would you always be thinking about what the other person was doing? Do you find yourself lonely and missing them even though others surround you?
If absence makes the heart grow fonder, and you can’t stand to be apart, then it might be worth saving this marriage.
5. You Don’t Argue or Fight
It’s healthy to disagree and get your opinion across, but if you go to great lengths to protect the other person, then it’s a sign that there’s something beautiful there. It takes a lot of patience and excellent communication to sustain a relationship. Being protective of their feelings, even in the heated moments, shows your love and devotion for them.
6. You’re Great Role Models
The best couples are the ones that can have disagreements about money or other issues, but they never take them out into the open. You make sure that you are always upfront and honest with each other, but you do it behind closed doors. When it comes to your family and children, you never air dirty laundry in front of others.
There’s nothing worse than a couple that fights and argues in front of others, especially your kids. It makes them feel uncomfortable, and they might feel as if they need to choose sides. If you are still great role models though there are issues, you may have something worth working on.
7. You Can’t Stand the Thought of Being Apart
Does it scare you at the thought of your relationship ending? Do you feel like you cannot live one day without them? Wanting to be close to the one you love is essential to make things work.
How does the other person feel about you? Is there devotion to you on the same level as your devotion to them? If the thought of them not being there when you wake up in the morning scares you, then your marriage may be worth saving.
8. The Good Outweighs the Bad
Into everyone’s life, a little rain must fall, but does the sunshine outweigh the storms? Can you look at your marriage and say that the good times have always been way better than the bad?
Sometimes relationships go through so many struggles that it becomes tough to stay together. However, if you can look at all the trials with a smile remembering something good that came out of it, then it’s a sign that you have something worthwhile.
9. You Both 100 Percent Committed
Are you both committed to each other no matter what the troubles you’re facing? Do you know that they’ve got your back, and are your biggest cheerleader? If one of you is in the relationship 100 percent and the other only 50 percent, then it’s hard to make things work.
While things may seem a bit turbulent right now, when you’re both committed to making it better, it makes a big difference.
10. You’re Still Number One
If you called your spouse right now and needed them to drop everything to get to you, would they come? It would help if you were committed for things to work, but you also need to know that they will put their life on hold to help you.
When the chips are down, they are right there when you need them. A love like that surely doesn’t come around very often, and you should invest time and effort into saving your union.
Is it Time to Let Go of the Marriage?
You’ve read all the beautiful reasons why you should keep your marriage healthy, but how do you know when it’s time to move on? Don’t waste the best years of your life loving someone who could never love you the same way.
You deserve to have someone who will love you and be there for your 100 percent. Here are some signs it’s time to let them go.
1. You Argue 24/7
No one likes to live in a war zone. If you’re fighting and yelling every day, then you might want to rethink your union. It’s not healthy to live in a constant state of unrest, and you deserve to have a home filled with peace and love.
2. They’ve Cheated on You
Some people can forgive cheating and move on to have a great life. However, others cannot move past such a massive event. If they’ve cheated once or ten times, can you live with the betrayal?
3. Your Spouse is Not There for You
Do you need to schedule an appointment just to talk to them about the children or the finances? Is there work taking over their life and they have little time for the family? While this person may be trying to make a living and provide for you, it’s hard to have a relationship when the other party is married to their job or socially isolates you from their life.
4. You Can’t Trust Your Spouse Anymore
Do you have a hard time trusting him or her and doubt every word out of their mouth? When you’ve lied to time, and again, it makes it hard to believe. Lying is a horrible habit that can wreck relationships. Your wedded bliss can end abruptly if they lie and are dishonest about things.
5. You Dread Being Around Them
The spark that you once had it gone. There’s no longing for them to come home from work, and there are no more sweet nothings being whispered in your ear when you wake up. The fire that once burned so strong is now nothing more than smoldering coals.
Part of having a relationship is being together. If you find yourself dreading those times of intimacy or even being in the same room, then maybe it’s time to let them go.
Final Thoughts: Should You Stay in the Marriage or End Things?
It’s hard to make decisions about love and relationships. Sometimes people become quite comfortable with a routine and don’t want to change things. Though making changes are never easy, it’s not good to live in a toxic relationship either.
Newlywed bliss only lasts for a short time, and then you must face the real world and everyday life. There are odd work schedules, financial burdens, and cares that come about every day. Life certainly brings with it troubles that can have a dramatic impact on any relationship, but you must cleave to each other no matter what is going on around you.
Maybe you feel like the marriage has sustained so many blows that you can’t possibly go on another day? It would help if you tried counseling and time apart to work on your issues and then issues as a couple. This person shouldn’t make you miserable. Life and circumstances can get you down, but your spouse should be the one thing that you can always count on.