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10 Reasons Never to Accept Body Shaming »

10 Reasons Never to Accept Body Shaming »

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the perfect body of them all? Why, of course, you do! There has never been anyone quite like you in the history of humans, nor will there ever be. Then why is our society so caught up in body shaming when we each have unique qualities that make us individuals?

Thanks to global media, you are continually being assaulted by images of what they consider the perfect body. Of course, they fail to mention that these models are often malnourished, and the photos are tweaked with light, makeup, camera, and computer tricks. These fake silicone-injected models display expensive goods and services and suggest that they will make you just as beautiful, successful, and wealthy.

These images and advertisements subliminally promote body shaming, and we continue to buy into the sham. Average Americans sink billions of dollars annually into the beauty and diet industry, hoping for miraculous results. It’s a slippery slope that can bankrupt you financially, emotionally, and spiritually.

How can you boost your self-confidence and finally discover self-acceptance? Many Hollywood stars are speaking out against body shaming and are sharing their stories of overcoming poor body images. Although former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt was often cruelly criticized for not measuring up to society’s beauty standards, she remarked that nobody could make her feel inferior without her permission.

10 Ways to End Body Shaming and Love the Skin You’re In

It’s time to start accepting and loving yourself just as you are. You don’t need a product or service to make you just as good as anyone else, because you already are. Consider these ten reasons why you will no longer need or tolerate body shaming in your life.

1. You are Unique

Even identical twins have unique fingerprints and genetic makeup. Nature abounds with countless variety and individualism, so why would humans want to be any different? Instead of fighting against having a diverse body, embrace it.

You must revel in the body you have. If someone has a problem with your body, it’s their problem and not yours. You must love you to the fullest.

2. You have Redefined Beauty for Yourself

Each era and culture have their definition of beauty, so why can’t you? Not every culture values skinny figures, overly processed hair, or artificially plumped bosoms. You will be hard-pressed to find any of these fake images in an average crowd at the grocery store.

Make it a habit to notice people when you are in a group. Notice how different colors of skin, eyes, hair, and body shapes weave an intricate quilt of beauty. Take a cue from nature and find joy and grace in being different.

3. You’ve Made Friends with Your Body

Body shaming creates a culture of self-loathing with negative consequences. Eating disorders are still a life-threatening epidemic, especially among young women. The hallmark of these often- fatal mental diseases is a distorted body image.

Talk to your professional healthcare provider about the diet and lifestyle that is right for you. Make it a habit of looking in the mirror every day and love yourself. If you need to lose a few pounds, do it out of love and appreciation, not hate.

4. You Show Gratitude Every Day

It’s normal to feel a little blue and down on yourself occasionally. One way to start loving yourself again is to practice gratitude. Since it’s a practice, you must do it regularly to see positive results.

When was the last time you were grateful for your life and who you are? These blessings are more important than any material gain. If you think you’ve nothing to be thankful for, then visit a few hospitals and nursing homes and talk to folks who would give anything to have your health and vitality.

Consider keeping a gratitude journal or write positive affirmations on sticky notes to place around your house. Whenever you enter your journal or see a happy note stuck to your mirror, you will be reminded of all the beautiful things that make you unique.

grateful people

5. You’ve Learned to Eliminate the Negative

Body shaming is a devastating force that thrives in a negative environment. Once you have decided to defeat it with self-confidence, you will discover other negative influences that must go. Cultivating a loving and positive atmosphere takes work and determination, but you are up for the challenge.

You work too hard for your money and resources to waste it on things that make you feel bad about yourself. Unsubscribe to any magazine or media outlet that promotes body-shaming and a false sense of beauty. While you can’t eliminate negative influences, you can choose what to believe.

How about friends and family in your close circle? Are they positive influences in your life, or do they burden you with criticism? If someone can’t love you for the beautiful soul you are, then don’t waste any more energy to keep them near.

6. You Want to be Healthy instead of Skinny

Since obesity has been an epidemic in America for a while, most of us could lose a pound or two for health’s sake. How many times have you watched the late-night infomercials on tv about popular weight loss programs? Most of these gimmicky programs promise to make you skinny in little time with minimal effort.

After you lost a ton of money and a few pounds, you probably gained the weight back plus some. Body shaming and fad diets go hand in hand, and they’re a lucrative ploy. In those cheesy infomercials, you will probably see skinny actors prancing around who never even had weight issues.

If your healthcare provider has recommended a sensible weight loss and fitness regimen for you, the goal is to be healthy, not necessarily skinny. Did you know that many rail-thin people are often malnourished and have as many health risks as those who are overweight? Your body size will never dictate your beauty or worth as a person.

7. You Accentuate Your Inner Beauty

We all know the saying that beauty is only skin deep, but that saying is only partially true. Humans are hardwired to be attracted by the lust of the eye, so beauty is beauty at first. However, it is originality and a beautiful spirit and attitude that will solidify the attraction.

Did you know that your most beautiful accent piece is your smile? Even if your neck is ornamented with diamonds, your pearly whites will be what stands out the most. How you feel about yourself and the world will be evident in your expressions and how you carry yourself.

inner beauty
Learn the habits of people who have genuine inner beauty.

8. You Create Your Sense of Style

Back in the day, you often found clothing tags that falsely proclaimed one size fits all. Even when clothing manufacturers revised it to one size fits most, it still isn’t so. No color, style, or shape is flattering to everyone who tries to wear it.

Don’t put a lot of credibility into fashion trends. As you learn to build your wardrobe around your styling sense, trendiness won’t matter as much. Buy classic pieces that will mix and match with other things in your closet. When you buy the best quality you can afford, these pieces will allow you to dress for several seasons.

Refuse to allow current fashion to dictate your wardrobe choices. Wear colors and styles that flatter your figure and make you feel beautiful. Dress age-appropriate and learn how to use accent pieces to your advantage, remembering that understated is often most attractive.

9. You No Longer Need a Mask of Makeup

The same rules apply when you use makeup, which should be used only to accent your natural beauty. When you lean heavy on the cosmetics, you may appear more like a clown than a queen. Don’t hide your lovely radiance behind a mask of makeup.

A genuine smile and an attitude of self-acceptance are worth far more than overloaded lashes or artificially plumped lips. Nobody is happy all the time, so you needn’t glue a smile on your face if you aren’t feeling it. As a beautiful person, you let your soul shine through and are true to your feelings.

10. Be an Advocate for Yourself and Others

An effective way to fight the plague of body shame is to let your voice be heard. Stand up for yourself if someone says something inappropriate or hurtful, even in jest. Let these people know that you won’t tolerate their judgmental attitude.

Your money is a powerful force in the market, so refuse to patronize businesses and companies that promote false body perception and exclude customers who are different. Instead, buy goods and services from those who value individualism, freedom of expression, and multiculturalism.

Final Thoughts: Stop Body Shaming Yourself and Wear Self Confidence Instead

It’s been said that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. When you are self-confident, you don’t accept body shaming in any way. You become your definition of beauty in body, mind, and spirit.


12 Tips to Help You Accept Compliments Gracefully

12 Tips to Help You Accept Compliments Gracefully

You’d be surprised at how many people don’t know how to accept compliments gracefully. If you thought you were the only one, don’t feel bad. You are not alone.

It seems to be hard for people to just accept a compliment. The reactions and responses that are given are often awkward, surprising, hilarious, or even rude. The wrong answer happens so often that there should be a workshop on how to accept praise from others.

There may not be a workshop available, but we have some fantastic tips to help you work on your compliment-accepting etiquette. Here are 12 tips that will make you better at accepting praise gracefully.

12 Tips to Help You Feel More Comfortable When You Accept Compliments


1. Acknowledge the Person Giving the Compliment

One of the worst things you can do when someone compliments you is ignoring them. Ignoring a person that complimented you is cold and rude. People will quickly stop liking you. No one is saying you must have an extended conversation with the person, but even a small acknowledgment of their compliment is the right thing to do.

The first step to accept compliments gracefully is acknowledgment. Without it, none of the other steps in the list matter. So, when someone gives you a tribute, don’t just walk by like you don’t hear them or see them.

2. Say “Thank You”

The absolute best way to accept compliments gracefully is simply to say, “thank you.” That’s it – nothing more. Sometimes it can feel awkward to say only those two words. You may be left wondering what to do next. Should you return the favor? Keep the kind words going? Don’t worry – just act naturally, as you would if they hadn’t complimented you.

Simply smile and be humble about receiving the compliment. The person who gave you the praise isn’t expecting anything in return from you. Thank you are two powerful words.

3. Watch Your Body Language

Your mouth can say one thing, but your body could mean something different. You don’t want to send mixed messages when you’re receiving a kind word. The person complimenting you might feel as if they’ve offended you. Even worse, you don’t want them to think you’re smug.

The best body language in this situation is the approachable body language. Have good eye contact and a slight smile (to show that you like the compliment). Also, try to keep yourself “open” to the person. Don’t cross your legs or arms, and don’t try to “hide.”

body language

4. Be Humble

When someone pays you a compliment, you should be appreciative that they took the time from their day to notice something beautiful about you. The way you respond is everything – you don’t want to come off as some stuck-up person who thinks they’re better than everyone else. This advice might sound a bit extreme, but that’s how people will feel about you if you can’t humbly accept a compliment.

To be humble, don’t respond with comments like, “of course I look great,” or, “what do you expect? These are designer shoes.” While this may be true, you still shouldn’t say it. If you make comments like these jokingly, that might be okay, but you again must watch your tone of voice to avoid coming off as stuck-up.

5. Be Genuine

You could do the three tips above, plus the rest of them in this list, but if you’re being fake, people will spot that from a mile away. Even if you think you’re the best liar in the world, sometimes people will still see right through you. There is no need to be disingenuous when someone compliments unless you don’t like compliments. However, like every other human on the planet, of course, you like them.

When someone is kind to you, you should genuinely appreciate that. After all, they didn’t have to spend a minute or two of their time on you, but they found it essential to do something to brighten your day.

6. Don’t Let Pride Take Over

There is nothing wrong with having pride in your accomplishments, but when someone gives you a compliment about them, don’t be so prideful that your response comes off as rude or arrogant. Sometimes people do this, and it’s not even on purpose. They may not realize the type of response they’re giving because their pride is blinding them.

Take pride in your accomplishments, but when someone compliments you, push your satisfaction back just a little bit so you can be more down to earth. Remember, even if only briefly, that you’re not better than anyone else. This humbling approach will help you accept a compliment gracefully.

7. Repay the Compliment

Repaying the compliment is a great way to accept compliments gracefully. Just as their praise made you feel good, yours can make the person feel good also. As long as it’s done in good taste, everyone walks away from the situation feeling like a winner.

Keep in mind that you need to keep the compliment genuine and straightforward. Don’t overdo it, or it will seem like you’re merely trying to outdo their tribute. For example, if someone says they like your shoes, you could respond with, “thanks! I like yours too!” However, only give honest compliments! If you don’t like their shoes, choose something else.

8. Don’t Be Overly Excited

A compliment is a small gesture of kindness and acknowledgment. That means it doesn’t warrant an over-the-top reaction. Besides thinking you’re a bit bizarre, you’ll make people think you are disingenuous. While you may merely be trying to show your appreciation, your over-the-top reaction can make people feel uncomfortable.

So how do you know when your reaction is just too much? Most compliments are done so in a “conversational” manner. Therefore, if your response is out of the bounds of a normal conversation, you’ve probably done too much. This point leads to the next tip on the list.

Here are ten red flags that show someone feels entitled.

9. Match Their Level of Enthusiasm

This bulletpoint expands upon the last tip. If you overreact, people are going to think you’re just a bit off. However, if you under-react, that can leave them feeling a bit confused. They could believe that you misunderstood their compliment or that they may have unintentionally said something wrong. Either way, under-reacting is not a way to accept compliments gracefully.

Instead, try to match their enthusiasm. This includes their tone, volume, and rate of speech. This doesn’t mean you have to fake it or analyze the compliment before responding. Just match their energy. If you allow it to flow naturally, it’s not hard to match energy levels.

10. Don’t Toast Your Toast

There is a right way and a wrong way to receive a toast. Many people aren’t aware of this, and they don’t mean any harm when they receive their toast the wrong way. However, it’s very ungraceful to toast to yourself. In other words, if the toast is to you when everyone else raises a glass and drinks from it, your glass should remain firmly on the table.

Drinking to your toast is like complimenting yourself and patting yourself on the back for the compliment. Instead, smile, nod, and accept the toast. Drink after your toast is over. Even better – return the compliment by toasting someone else.

11. Don’t Attack the Compliment

Sometimes insecurities can cause you to question a compliment, but attacking compliments is not a way to accept compliments gracefully. When people give compliments, it’s coming from their hearts. Attacking the compliment is equivalent to discrediting their judgment. Even worse, it can come off as condescending.

Say, for example, your coworker says, “you nailed that presentation!” You then respond by saying, “if you thought that was good, you must not have seen very many presentations.” While you didn’t intend to cause harm, this can make the person feel like you’re saying they’re not qualified to compliment you. Avoid this by only accepting the compliment.

12. Don’t Go Fishing

You may have heard the saying “fishing for compliments”. This habit isn’t a good thing. When someone compliments you, just take it. Don’t try to stretch it out or pull more out of the person. If they tell you that your dress looks nice, don’t ask them what they like the best about it. That just makes the conversation awkward and makes you look self-centered. Simply accept the compliment, then change the conversation or move on.

complimentsFinal Thoughts on How to Accept Compliments Gracefully

Most of the time, when people respond wrong to a compliment, they don’t mean any harm. They simply don’t know how to accept the compliment. Some people may even be slightly embarrassed by a compliment. However, with practice, you can get good at taking them.

The 12 tips above are great starting points in accepting praise gracefully. You don’t have to do them all. Start with a few and keep trying them until you find the ones that work best for you. Before you know it, you probably be able to accept compliments more gracefully than you’d ever imagined!