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What are the things men pay attention to in your relationship?

There are no concrete analogies that can describe love relationships. As in the case of men and women, you may claim the attraction of opposites. However, no relationship can last unless the partners have things in common, so the old saying that birds of a feather flock together is accurate.

Most people don’t pay attention to their quirks, but men are sure to notice your idiosyncrasies. You may be surprised at the things that men pay attention to that you don’t. Perhaps it’s because you are too busy with your infatuation of him.

Do you ever take those little love quizzes in magazines or online? Some of the questions about your mate may be obvious, while others require a more intuitive response. If your guy took a quiz about you and your personality, would he pass with flying colors?

The beauty of a committed relationship is that you complement one another. That’s not to say that you aren’t a complete person in your own right. It means that your love balances each other’s strengths and weaknesses. Such a feat can’t be accomplished without love, empathy, and a lot of work.

Physical attraction is what sparked your mutual interest, but only love and respect will keep you together. Have you ever gazed in the mirror to see what your lover sees? Maybe the little flaws that you’re so sensitive about have never mattered to him.

Since he loves you, your mate wants to make you happy. The only way he can do that is if he genuinely pays attention to you, the things you say, and what you do. Men pay attention to patterns and can tell when you need extra love and support.

Does He Speak Your Love Language?

Part of being in a relationship is knowing how your mate loves, also called love language. Men usually show their love and affection differently than women do. Your guy may show his affection by doing something sweet and romantic, while you may prefer putting your feelings into words.

If you are both being genuine to each other and yourselves, each love language is beautiful and acceptable. What does he see that you no longer do? Is it the automatic way you carry yourself with grace and dignity?

10 Things That Men Pay Attention To (That Most Women Don’t)

Does he notice that you are more self-confident when you are wearing your favorite color? Here are ten things that men pay attention to about you that may be surprising.

1. Your Smile

The eternal beauty Marylin Monroe once noted that a woman’s greatest asset was her smile. No makeup product, designer dress, or dazzling jewelry can ever compete with the genuine smile you give your sweetheart. When he is having a bad day, a simple smile or a gleeful grin may be the thing that lifts his spirits.

The female smile has long been the subject of poetry and art, like the mysteriously demurring smile of Leonardo’s Mona Lisa. Frequently, a well-timed grin may get your man’s attention, as he wonders what you are thinking. The Mona Lisa isn’t sharing her secret.

2. Your Diet

Since men are biologically hardwired to be protectors and providers, men pay attention to what their lover is putting on her plate. Perhaps you feel comfortable with a few salad greens and a sliver of chicken. For you, it’s part of a healthy diet and your usual appetite, but he may subconsciously see your humble meal as his lack of provision for you.

Don’t be surprised if he encourages you to stack your plate high. Perhaps if you do, he might feel less guilty about the feast on his plate. It’s okay to stick to your guns and eat what you like.

3. Your Style

In the animal kingdom, it’s the males that are bursting with color and other characteristics to pique the drab females’ curiosity. Fortunately for humans, women usually have a monopoly on beauty and style. Your style is probably so ingrained in you that you don’t have to give it much thought.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and men pay attention to how you look in what you wear. Men are often attracted to women who are sure of themselves and aren’t afraid to be different. Believe it or not, he may have a better idea than your best girlfriend in what styles look best.

4. Your Passions

Part of loving a man or woman is to know what they like and what’s important to them. It’s a vital part of any lasting relationship. If your lover has been with you long enough, he will soon learn the passions that are close to your heart.

No matter your hobbies or interests, a true soulmate will know and encourage you to excel in your talents. Why does he seem to have a knack for picking gifts that reflect your hobbies and other interests? Men pay attention to what brings you joy, and he wants to be part of it.

5. Your Expressions

Although you may not realize it, your sweetheart is studying your face while gazing lovingly into your eyes. As you both practice active listening and empathizing with each other’s feelings, he will notice which of your expressions match your emotions. Consequently, women are usually better at these subtle cues, but love can do a lot for the male intuition.

You may be able to fool your friends or co-workers, but your sweetheart will know when your expressions aren’t congruent with your emotions or conversations. He can look at your face and notice when you’re feeling defeated, angry, or hurt. Sometimes, you can look into each other’s eyes and never say a word. Yet, you both seem to know what is going on due to the bond and connection you have with each other and your facial expressions.

6. Your Conversation

Countless studies demonstrate that men and women communicate differently. How many times have you been irritated at your man because he missed a cue in your conversation? Women are usually more in tune with their feelings, and you know how to vocalize how you feel.

While your man’s communication skills may be your opposite, he can often read between the lines. He knows which subjects are taboo and which ones you enjoy. If you are normally an animated conversationalist, he often can intuit your moods by your energy and the cadence of your voice.

7. Your Quirks

Even if you are in a long-term relationship, you both are still individuals with similarities and differences. For any relationship to be healthy and lasting, you learn your partner’s little quirks and deal with them. If these differences don’t infringe on each other’s rights and happiness, then be willing to cut ties and move on.

Your beau knows your oddities and will be as understanding with yours as you are with his. If you’ve been diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive tendencies, your quirks may be linked to anxiety. Either way, he knows and understands everything about you.

8. Your Favorite Foods

Do you remember where you first met each other or had your first dinner for two? Your man took notice of what you were eating and drinking. Does it warm your heart when he remembers how you like your coffee and that you prefer mayo instead of mustard on your sandwiches?

When he knows your favorite foods and beverages, choosing an eatery for date nights is a breeze. He remembers your favorite restaurant, the dish you order, and what you were drinking. On special occasions, he may prepare your favorite meal for a quiet dinner at home for an added treat.

9. Your Favorite Color

Did you know that women usually perceive color better than men do? Now you know why you often help your mate differentiate between black and navy socks. All men should, at the very least, remember the color of their lover’s eyes.

Not only does your partner know and adore your eye color, but he also remembers your favorite color. He notices the dominant hue in your wardrobe and how you look in it. When he’s picking out a gift for you, he doesn’t need to stop and think about the best color to choose.

10. Your Pet Peeves

Pet peeves are usually irritating quirks you notice in other people. While there will always be disagreements in any relationship, considerate mates know what pushes each other’s buttons, and they try to stay clear of those situations. You are probably quite vocal with your beau when it comes to things that grind your nerves.

Many of your pet peeves may not have anything to do with him. However, he may do little things like leave the toilet seat up or crunch too loud on his potato chips. As your sweetheart, men pay attention to the things that tick you off and try to keep them at a minimum, as you should with his pet peeves.

Final Thoughts on Recognizing the Things To Which Men Pay Attention

Relationships are a labor of love that is worth every moment. It means that you are lovers, best friends, and most influential advocates. The more your man takes notice of you, the more he can meet your needs physically, emotionally, and spiritually. On the flip side, if he doesn’t notice those little things about you, then he’s not that into you.

Moving in with a partner is a huge and exciting step in any relationship. It can also be nerve-wracking and leave you wondering if you are truly ready to leap this milestone with your loved one.

Many couples indeed face some difficulties after moving in together. Luckily, you can circumvent a lot of these potential problems by making sure you’re on the same page and keeping certain things in mind beforehand. Here’s how a therapist reveals seven things to remember before moving in with a partner.

1.    Needs and Expectations

You might think you know your partner inside-out, and perhaps you do! Even so, it’s always a good idea to have one’s needs and expectations listed out and openly discussed. To ensure that moving in remains a positive and pleasant experience, both you and your partner need to see this is a challenge that you have to work together to overcome!

With that in mind, here are a few key topics you might want to tackle first:

·         Discuss Expectations

Research confirms that close interpersonal relationships work best when both parties are forthcoming with their wants, needs, and desires. Sit down with your partner beforehand and have an open discussion about simple things like routines (both on a daily, weekly, and monthly schedule), whether you’d rather set the table instead of preparing dinner, and what you’re looking to get out of this living situation.

·         Set Boundaries

Even when both you and your partner get very close, living in close quarters together can put a strain on even positive relationships. As a result, it’s best to listen to the experts and take the time to set down some boundaries. These can range from more obvious ones like time priorities and how much quality time you both want or need, to more straightforward questions about who’s in charge of paying for the groceries and the bills. This talk shouldn’t be a one-time discussion either – experts suggest catching up with each other on these discussions on a daily or weekly basis, so you both will stay on the same page as much as possible.

·         Figure Out Your Intention

While moving in with your partner may seem like a natural and exciting evolution in your relationship, it’s crucial to pause still and consider why you’re taking this big step. Positive thinking aside, it’s possible that you or your partner may be doing this for reasons that are rooted in fear, rather than growth. And that needs to be something you both need to look into, to avoid problems in the future.

·         Intimacy

It’s only natural to expect intimacy from your partner when you move in together – both sexual and romantic. That said, it’s crucial to discuss intimacy needs, sexual expectations, and any potential discrepancies between you and your partner’s libido in advance. This chat is so you can make sure that both of you are on the same page when it comes to intimacy needs and expectations before moving in together.

·         Determine Your End Goal

Moving in together is a significant upgrade in anyone’s relationship, but this relationship upgrade shouldn’t be an end goal in and of itself. There should be plenty of other long-term goals that you both might have or ought to discuss after achieving this exciting goal, says Widener University Human Sexuality Program assistant professor Dr. Sabitha Pillai-Friedman. For example, you would both need to decide if you would like to simply just wait and see how your relationship develops, or commit to each other permanently, or even get married!

2.    Financial Concerns

The most natural assumption would be that money is a frequent source of conflict between partners living together. A study, however, has proven that this isn’t the case. Don’t start celebrating just yet, though: the same study also showed that money problems also last longer and are often harder to resolve. This outcome is usually because both of you might disagree on just how much money should be put into those saving accounts – or if that goal is worth saving for at all.

Additionally, it bears keeping in mind that you will both have to decide who’s financially in charge of which bills as well – especially if you’re bringing along extra expenses in the form of pets and the like. As such, author, TV host, and relationship expert Andrea Syrtash recommends discussing financial issues before moving in together. Who’s paying for what? How much do you earn? Lay it all on the table!

3.    Quirks and Habits

Things that may seem adorable or cute to either of you may quickly turn into a nuisance once you find yourself dealing with it 24/7. It’s best first to discuss such things and to also reveal to each other if there’s anything else the other doesn’t know about you. After all, neither of you will be able to hide it from each other while living together!

Additionally, both of you ought to hammer out and discuss who should do which chores, and how frequently. This planning can prevent fights over household cleanliness levels, resentment towards one another, and awkward situations where some aspect of the household gets neglected – to everyone’s depriment.

4.    It Won’t Be Easy, But You’re In This Together

Frankly speaking, living together is not easy to do. So you should come to expect that things are going to go south sometimes. Even so, both you and your partner should consider each other a team trying to overcome challenges – not enemies. So with that in mind:

·         Prepare To Get On Each Other’s Nerves

When living together in the same space, it’s only inevitable that you will get irritated by your partner more often than usual. It’ll likely be in the form of little habits and quirks that annoys either of you and only when you both start living together – like leaving empty cups in the sink for days or your partner’s penchant for smelly foods. Be prepared for this to happen, and don’t let it bring you too much anxiety, says Relationship Expert Justin Lavelle.

·         Prepare For The Ugly

The most intimate method to get to know someone, warts, and all truly, is to live with them. This experience is how you’ll find out if they are neat freaks that drive you crazy, or if they’re the type to live in a pigsty without a care in the world! Both of you should hammer out as much of this as possible in advance, but you’re still going to have to mentally prepare that things can get bad or ugly as well – and you’ll have to continue living with them anyway.

·         Communicate More Than Ever

Once you start living together full time, excellent communication becomes crucial. Research proves that specific communication skills – like the ability to express emotions openly and maturely – are incredibly important if you want to be able to live together happily. This habit is especially so since there is now no room for either of you to escape to, should tempers flare and people get hurt.

5.    Chores and Responsibilities

There will continuously be things that have to be done. Either the floors must be swept, or the bathrooms scrubbed, or the garbage is taken out. Whatever it is, both you and your partner will have to figure out how to divvy up the chore list.

Ideally, you’ll want to:

• Discuss the frequency of certain chores and responsibilities, and if there are certain chores either of you prefers or hates
• Ask each other what household tasks needed and what rooms you’ll want to manage.
• Create a schedule with individual responsibilities for both of you

Bear in mind that all this needn’t be set in stone if either changes your mind. Both of you need to figure out how to get the chores sorted and completed without either one of you feeling like the division of labor is uneven.

6.    There Will Be Changes

It’s naive to assume that the relationship both of you share will remain static and unchanging after such a huge, life-changing event – or even over time.

While neither of you will suddenly become different people overnight, it’s important to remember that with time comes a change in goals and aspirations. It may affect one’s disposition and behavior, and that is something that might cause clashes between both of you.

Additionally, once you move in together, both of you are going to have to contend with lifestyle adjustments, says relationship specialist J. Hope Suis. This adjustment phase is normal and expected whenever you move in with anyone. Thus, it’s a good idea to discuss things with them first.

7.    Break-Up Plans

Nobody wants to think about this, especially if you haven’t moved in yet. But it’s essential to think about how you and your partner are going to be able to pull out if living together doesn’t work.

For example, some things you’ll have to keep in mind are:

·         Finances

Melding finances together is much easier than trying to separate it later. If you share a joint account, how do you both split the money? What happens to the bills and fees?

·         Assets

Once you and your partner stop living together, you naturally will no longer be sharing belongings and assets. It’s essential to keep in mind that you will both have to figure out and decide who gets possession of what item(s) – which will only get exponentially more difficult after living together for long periods.

·         Logistics

If living together is no longer a viable solution, both of you will still need someplace to live in. Additionally, both of you will have to figure out how to move your respective belongings out later too.

It’s natural to cling on to positive thinking and hope that this is a situation that both you and your partner won’t have ever to worry about or think about. But it’s always a good idea to plan for this possibility, to make things smoother and easier should the unthinkable happen. According to relationship expert and podcast host Damona Hoffman, this can make for a more amicable split.

Final Thoughts On Some Things To Remember Before Moving In With Partner

It’s equally thrilling and frightening to move in with a partner. Making sure, first, you are on the same page and remembering certain things before the big step forward can help make the transition smoother.

Few people can confidently say that experience no regrets. Sadly, a part of life is all about doing things that you won’t look back on favorably later. It is how we, as human beings, learn and grow!

But regrets can grow bigger and bigger until they become very painful for you. They can even reach a point where you begin to obsess over them – and that leads to more regrets! So how can you stop this cycle from continuing? Here’s how a psychologist explains 12 ways to stop regretting and make peace with yourself.

1.    Alter Your Current Course

If you find yourself always unhappy or feeling like you’ve missed out, then this might be a sure-fire sign that you need to change something in your life. According to California Polytechnic State University Professor of Psychology Shawn Meghan Burn, Ph.D., regret can be a way of the brain, informing you that change is needed.

Consider that perhaps you need to:

• Consider going back to school.
• Switch jobs to something more fulfilling
• Step away and leave an unhealthy relationship
• Reach out to others and restore relationships
• Learn how to express your emotions, both positive and negative
• Travel and explore the world
• Move to a new home
• Take better charge of your physical, emotional, and mental states.

2.    Know That You Are Fallible

It’s natural for humans to make mistakes at some point – that’s just how it is, says child and adolescent psychiatrist and author Mark Banschick, MD. Always regretting and lamenting the faults in your decisions, however, isn’t healthy. Understand that your mistakes aren’t you, and you’re still a wonderful person, worthy of love despite your mistakes.

If you don’t learn to accept and move on from your mistakes, that prolonged sense of regret may interfere with:

• Your sense of self
• Aspects of your relationships
• Your career
• Your ability to care for your health
• Positive thinking

3.    Apologize

Many of us would feel that we ought to carry our regret as punishment for hurting someone, says Burn, but this sort of guilty and shameful form of sorrow is unhealthy and unhelpful – especially if there is nothing else that can be said or done after the events have passed. Research shows us that it is better for everyone involved to:

• Avoid victimizing yourself, both internally and externally
• Offer a genuine and honest apology without beating yourself up
• Try to make it up to them; then, amend things the best you can
• Use this as motivation to change your behavior and future actions for the better

It’s very likely that the person you may have hurt will forgive you upon this apology, and won’t hold it against you. They may not even remember what you had done, or considered it hurtful!

4. Don’t Keep Thinking “Should”

Are you someone who struggles with positive thinking, and defaults to self-hatred instead? That may be the cause of your depression and anxiety. Research has shown that if you’re continually inflicting yourself with self-loathing, it will also effectively affect your mental state as well – alongside all of the actions and behaviors that spring from it.

This, as you can imagine, isn’t healthy for you or the people you love. Instead, it would be better for you to:

• Stop fixating on your past mistakes, and what you should’ve done.
• Understand and accept that the past is unchangeable
• Focus on the things you can do better in the here and now
• Actively chase after the positive things you desire, like love, acceptance, and gratitude.

5.    Alter The Narrative

We have all grown up with this fantasy of what would be the ideal version of our lives. While this fantastical vision serves as the ideal we want to work towards, reality – and the people within it – aren’t perfect, says Burns. Our life will always fall short of our plans and aspirations, and that’s perfectly normal and fine. So instead of continually comparing reality to your fantasy, try:

• Reminding yourself that setbacks and mistakes are natural, and a part of life
• Making different choices wouldn’t necessarily have resulted in a better experience and would’ve likely created a different set of regrets instead
• Imagining how much worse it could’ve been
• Think about how this is probably the path you may need to take to a better result you can’t yet imagine
• Take the time to count the blessings you’ve received and the lessons you’ve learned
• Give yourself credit for the things you did do right instead

Remember that it is impossible to perfectly replicate your imagined ideal life – reality and the people within it just don’t work that way

6.    Determine How Your Thoughts Affect You

Cogito ergo sum – I think, therefore I am. Philosophers, scientists, and entrepreneurs from all walks of life and across the entire breadth of human history – both modern and ancient – have understood the power of one’s thoughts. It’s essential to pay attention to the ideas that arise in your brain, says Banschick, for they:

• Affect your feelings
• Dictate your behavior
• Shape your intentions
• Cultivate your motivations

If you find your thoughts to be affecting you negatively, then you might want to consider changing them in some way or another. The goal is to make them work for you and support you instead of hindering you and filling you with regret.

7.    Find Triggers For Regretful Thoughts

Have you ever asked where your regrets stem from? What triggers the negativity within you? According to Mark Banschick, it’s a good idea to understand what exactly triggers that mindset of self-loathing and regret, so you can be mentally prepared for when such situations arise. This way, you can better combat them via techniques like:

• Deep breathing exercises
• Affirming statements
• Repetitive mantras
• Positive imagery
• Taking the time to step back out and ground yourself

8.    Forgive Yourself

Too often, we forget that we ought to forgive ourselves for the sins of our past as well. It may feel right to carry around self-directed guilt and regret as penance for our actions, but research shows that learning how to forgive ourselves is an essential step towards becoming a better person. Cultivating self-compassion and self-forgiveness is crucial to overcoming regret, says Burns. Here are a few things you can do to get started yourself:

• Be genuine in your self-directed apologies
• Forgive yourself, truly and deeply
• Understand that you will have imperfections, and those are acceptable and fine
• Free yourself to accept your mistakes and lapses of better judgment
• Do your best to apologize to those you think you’ve affected
• Trust yourself to do better, and to come out a wiser and stronger person

9.    Be Grateful

When all you can see is mistakes, regret, and shame, it can be easy to forget about where things have gone right. This, of course, is an unhealthy sort of rumination that only serves to hinder you and tear you down. Instead, try to:

• Start a mindfulness journal
• Set aside a few spare moments every day to dwell in gratitude
• Jot down a few things you value and appreciate every day
• Do your best to focus more on the positives over the negatives

Doing this regularly will help you pay attention to the good things in your life, which may help uplift your mood and spirits over time!

10. Forcefully Notice Negative Self-Talk

All that self-directed negativity is often untrue and rooted in shame that can hurt you. Thus, it means paying close attention to your thoughts as they unfold – and correcting them quickly – is a crucial step in the fight towards making peace with yourself, according to Banschick. This outcome happens because:

• Most negative internal monologue needs to be scrutinized and challenged with positive statements to create a healthier mindset
• These statements cannot be allowed to go checked and accepted as fact
• It’s usually more likely that the negative self-assessment is untrue and inaccurate
• The more they are repeated, the more deeply internalized they will be
• Letting such thoughts and feelings continue will sabotage your attempts and doing better
• They’ll often discourage you from improving yourself in the future
• Catching these thoughts in the act allows for immediate self-correction
• Practice makes perfect – repeated self-correcting will help replace these negative statements with truthful and positive ones over time

11. Ask Who You Want To Be

A consequence of being so rooted in one’s sense of shame and regret is that you end up focusing primarily on what you are, at the expense of what you want to be. After all, how can you move forward in life when you aren’t sure as to where you’re heading? On the path to self-acceptance and peace, it’s essential to:

• Take stock of your positive qualities
• Learn how to embrace your good traits
• Consider what attracts people to you and makes you desirable
• Acknowledge and take credit for your positive contributions to those around you
• Decide on what positive traits you want to expand and truly embody
• Remember that there are things about you that are worth appreciating and cherishing

This way, you can focus on what makes you unique and how you can continue to uplift yourself and those around you.

12. Focus On Self-Compassion

When struck with regret and guilt, we forget that we really ought to be kind to ourselves as well. Exercising self-compassion becomes even more critical if you’re someone who’s vulnerable to melancholy and depression, as research shows us that being kind to yourself is a necessary form of self-care.

This means that while taking the time to grieve for lost possibilities is alright, it’s also essential to move on. If you find yourself lodged in the past, you can try moving forward via:

• Reminding yourself that some things were just beyond your control
• Acknowledging any self-directed pain and anger you have, before explaining why you deserve kindness and forgiveness
• Deliberately pardoning yourself for the mistakes you’ve made.
• Taking a look at the context in which you made a choice. But remember your needs and wants at the time of decision

Final Thoughts On Some Ways To Stop Regretting And Make Peace With Yourself

It’s normal to have regrets, but it’s almost essential to try to overcome them. You have so many positive things in your future; why bother spending all that time looking to the past and being trapped in memories of things you can no longer change?

A child’s mind is highly impressionable. A lot of the things that you might think kids won’t notice, can ignore, or won’t remember may wind up influencing the people they become as adults. It can be quite the scary and overwhelming thought, especially for parents to many children!

As a parent, you need to be aware of the thoughts your child is exposed to and experiences. Unbeknownst to you, they could be very much affected by these factors, so keep an eye out! Here are five thoughts that can negatively impact a child’s mind.

1.    Negative Comparisons Harm a Child’s Mind

Even if the family environment is one that is loving and supporting, research shows that children as young as six will notice the difference. As you can imagine, this can affect a child negatively. This is then further worsened by our result-oriented society, which cares not for the effort put into a task.

After such comparisons, a child will find themselves wondering if there was a point in any of their efforts. When such thoughts are left to go unchecked, it can cause:

·         Damaged Relationships

It should come as no enormous surprise that children are emotionally vulnerable, and therefore will take your words to heart. Repeated comparison between them and their peers may make them not only despise their peers. They may also despise you for not being on their side. This result will likely damage any positive relationships they have with you and those around them.

·         Jealousy

Constant comparison between their betters will make a child naturally jealous. This only gets worse if they really cannot match up to said better, due to their better’s virtues are always being exaggerated or improved. Such emotions can easily torment a child and transform into hatred and even aggression with enough time and animosity.

·         Negativity

For a child to be measured against others and found repeatedly wanting, it can be hard for them to see themselves in any positive light. As a result, they will likely develop a defeated spirit that struggles with any sort of positive thinking. They will also likely infect others with their negative assumptions, and assume the worst of themselves and of any outcomes that will occur.

·         Nervous Upbringings

A child that is on the regular end of belittling and comparisons will naturally become nervous and jittery, and create in them a tendency to overly focus on pleasing those around them. This habit is because they will develop feelings of inadequacies as they continue to fail meeting expectations. Additionally, these doubts will make them lose any sense of autonomy, natural confidence, and knowledge of boundaries.

·         Self-Doubt

Being repeatedly told that they’re not good enough and that there’s always someone out there that’s better than them will only plant and encourage the seed of self-doubt. This leaves a child discouraged continuously as they double-think their capabilities and skills at every step of the way. They’ll often feel that they aren’t good enough as well.

2.    Jumping To Conclusions

To jump to conclusions is something that children do very often, for better or worse. This is primarily due to their struggles with developing IQ and emotional biases. Further, research reveals to us a significant impact on reasoning errors. If they are already used to negativity and comparisons, they are going to naturally gravitate to assuming the worst.

This behavior can result in them feeling hurt and accused, and be inclined to lash out and blame others when things go wrong. To avoid this, you’ll want to teach your children that:

·         Explain That Others Can Make Mistakes

Not all hurtful actions are intentional or mean-spirited. It is only natural for people to blunder, and those mistakes will often affect those around them – including your child. Despite the harm caused, it is best to teach your child that it’s likely the perpetrator had meant well and accidentally made an honest mistake. As such, they shouldn’t jump to conclusions, and instead, focus on positive thinking and offer the courtesy of forgiveness.

·         Teach Them About The Importance Of Evidence

Children are not rational and logical, and as such, are likely to accuse or suspect people based on gut feelings or baseless reasons. While gut feelings are useful and can be the first sign that something is wrong, your children should learn that it is best to look for real, proper evidence to back up such thoughts and feelings. This can help prevent hurt in the long-run, as looking for information to explain their reasoning may make them realize that they had no real cause at all.

·         Role-Play To Practice

Role-playing can help a child to learn how to empathize with others and understand. This activity encourages them to step into the shoes of others and see how the other person may have felt, and from there, have your child understand how they should, in turn, treat others. For example, you can ask a child about the last time they had accused someone. Then prompt their imagination as you ask your child how they would feel if they were in such a situation – and in turn, how it must’ve made the other person feel.

3.    Catastrophizing

To catastrophize is to magnify or minimize a situation or an outcome for the worst. In a parent, this form of catastrophizing stems from anxiety over a distressing situation – which, as research shows, is a behavior that can pass down to one’s child. This is because:

·         They Will Notice

Despite a parent’s active efforts to conceal their worries from their child, they will unintentionally show those anxieties via their behavior, such as overinvolvement. Children will then learn from such action subconsciously, and internalize that same sort of tension that their parents suffer from.

·         They Become Worried Too

As parent’s overinvolvement may result in them taking away any sense of agency from the child. In the process, this creates a sense of inadequacy, as children don’t successfully learn from their mistakes and situations. This outcome then gets worse in the future, as the child’s worries grow in proportion to increasingly difficult situations that they never learn how to handle.

·         They Struggle To Be Independent

Research tells us that a parent catastrophizing can result in them being more controlling, which takes away a child’s autonomy. Anxious parents are also slower and more reluctant to pull back on parental control, which results in a child struggling to understand how to care for themselves as they grow older.

4.    All-Or-Nothing Thoughts

Studies prove that children naturally struggle with nuance and accuracy. Instead, they’ll lean towards thinking in hyperboles, and gravitate towards the extreme as it is simply easier to understand. This, however, can result in all-or-nothing thinking, which can hurt a child’s self-esteem. It can also make it even more challenging for you as a parent to obtain an accurate picture of the situation when your child tries to tell you about it.

If you notice this happening on the regular, you ought to take this as a red flag that your child may be dealing with more cognitive distortion that is healthy. To break this habit, try:

·         Be A Good Example

Take a look at your behavior. Children tend to copy what they see precisely, so it’s likely that you might be unintentionally teaching them by action. Pay attention to your language, and hold yourself accountable for being accurate when you are communicating yourself.

·         Show Them That False Accusations Are Lies

It’s essential for your children to understand that extreme statements are often similar to lies, as they can be misleading and unfair. This still applies even if your child hadn’t thought of it as a lie, or intended to mislead someone – so long as it’s an untrue statement, it is not okay.

·         Provide Alternatives To This Pattern

Completely stopping a habit is not realistically possible. It’s much more useful for anyone – both child and adult – to instead swap the unwanted behavior with something more positive. For a child who’s still developing their vocabulary, you can try suggesting alternative terms that are more accurate. From there, teach them to practice it and remind them on the regular until it’s replaced their more extreme statements instead.

5.    Negative Labels

While labels are a quick and easy way to identify people, research suggests that they can also be harmful when it is negative and unfair – especially when it is an adult saddling a child with such labels.

When a child is labeled, it affects a child in the following ways:

·         The Labels Become Ingrained

Labels can be difficult to shake off. Doubly so with impressionable children, who are likely to take any negative feelings and words directed their way at face value. Once a child internalizes a label, it also solidifies any negative behavior as something they believe is part of themselves.

·         It Harms Self-Esteem

Negative labels will plant in your child’s mind the consistent negative qualities, even if said quality isn’t necessarily a bad thing. At such a young age, children will see these limiting beliefs as the truth that will shape their thoughts into adulthood permanently. This thinking pattern consequently can affect their sense of self-esteem as well.

·         You Feel Less Empathy

Placing a negative label on a child can make them appear that they are unchanging. It can also create a sense of distance between yourself and your child’s thoughts and emotions, which consequently makes it difficult for you to connect to them and see from their point of view. Instead, you’re more inclined to not look any deeper as you rely on the label to tell you all you need about the child – usually at the child’s expense.

Final Thoughts On Some Things That Can Negatively Impact A Child’s Mind

You don’t have to coddle a child to keep their mind safe. You can be a strict disciplinarian with a fair but firm parenting style. On the other hand, you can be the total opposite and be especially outwardly empathic in your parenting style. Or, you can be somewhere in between. These are all valid and workable parenting choices.

But the fact remains that, no matter what you choose, you still need to be a good parent and learn how what a child experiences can impact their mind. Learn to take note of thoughts that can harm a child and the way they develop and mature, then work to prevent or change them. You’ll be glad when your child doesn’t have to deal with these thoughts years down the line!

The character traits of an introvert are ones that indicate a life of solitude. Introverts feel most comfortable when they are alone and left to their thoughts and ideas. They come across as shy and quiet, but sometimes that isn’t the case.

They tend to rely on their mind to recharge their energy, whereas extroverts rely on others to recharge. Neither of these methods is wrong, it’s just the differences between the personality types.

Introverts tend to share many of the same character traits. With up to half of the people in the United States being an introvert, you likely know a few of them. It can be easy to identify an introvert if you know the character traits associate with the personality type.

15 Character Traits of an Introvert

1. They Enjoy Being Alone

Introverts look forward to time alone, while other people may dread the thought of alone time. They require solitude often to stay happy. The activities they enjoy tend to be ones that can be done alone because that’s when they feel the best.

This fact does not mean that your introverted pal will never want your companionship. Instead, it means that they thrive when they’ve spent time recharging their batteries–alone!

2. They Need Quiet to Concentrate

When there are things or sounds happening around them, introverts will struggle to focus. They may begin to feel overwhelmed and frustrated. Introverts become distracted more often than extroverts do, which is why they need quiet.

3. They Take Time to Make Decisions

Making decisions right away is not something an introvert can do. They have to think about it, weigh the options, and reflect on their feelings first. Then, after thinking about it and making a plan, they will be ready to make a decision.

4. Social Interaction Drains Introverts

Some people want to have plans every weekend, whereas introverts are the opposite. An introvert may still go out of go to a party, but they won’t stay as late and they won’t go every time. By the end of the night, they are ready to be comfortably back in their own home.

Introverts will feel exhausted after they’ve spent time around a crowd of people. They may feel stressed out and need a quiet day to themselves afterward to recuperate.

5. They are Often Thought to be Shy (and this misconception happens often!)

By people who don’t know them well, introverts are often described as being shy. This is because they prefer to be quiet and reserved.

They think about what they want to say and consider it heavily before speaking, so they may not speak much. Small talk isn’t something they will enjoy, so they would rather sit quietly instead of participating in a conversation.

6. They are Introspective

Introverts are often daydreamers who plan things out in their mind before things into action. They won’t begin on any project until they have had a good amount of time to think it through.

Often, they spend time self-reflecting and learning more about the things on their mind. This allows them to understand themselves and their feelings better. They are highly interested in making progress on their interests, and they prefer to feel prepared and ready.

7. They Learn by Watching

Introverts prefer to learn by watching the task be done. Through repeated observation, they can focus on the motions until they can do the task on their own. If they are required to learn in a hands-on way, they prefer to do it alone until they perfect it.

8. They Work Better Alone

Introverts dread group projects and can become overwhelmed quickly when they have to participate in one. They can work better on their own because they can focus better, allowing them to work more effectively.

It’s not that introverts don’t work well with others, it’s just that they can focus better alone. Some of this could come from the socialization aspects because it can cause anxiety or distraction for an introvert.

Due to this, they tend to look for jobs that allow them to always work alone. They gravitate toward careers such as being a writer, accountant, programmer, graphic designer, or artist.

9. They Love Deeply

Introverts might shy away from falling in love quickly. But when they finally find someone special, look out! They love deeply and genuinely care about the people in their life. They keep their group of friends and loved ones small, and they highly value those relationships. This is one of the reasons that they love more deeply than extroverts.

Since they think things through so much, introverts like to show people how much they love them. They tend to do this by surprising their loved ones with small acts of kindness.

10. They Zone Out Often

This could be related to their introspective qualities. When they can, they will zone out to escape their current situation.

They let their mind wander from what they are supposed to be doing to what they would rather be doing. This happens most often when they are feeling overwhelmed or uncomfortable in the present environment. Others may think it means they are unfocused or being rude, but it’s a way of survival for the introvert.

11. They are Loyal

Introverts take a long time to get to know someone. They also keep their group of friends small. So, when you become close to them, they will always be loyal to you.

Since they have invested so much into the relationship, you can expect they won’t blow you off or betray you. They will also be extremely hurt if you betray them or end the friendship.

12. They Have a Close Group of Friends and Like to Keep it That Way

While they prefer to be alone, introverts do have close friends who they enjoy spending time with. They will keep their group of friends small, and will often resist new friends. It’s normal that they only have relationships that make them happy and are quality relationships.

13. They Like People to Make a Plan Before Coming Over

Introverts don’t like anything to be unexpected, but unexpected visitors are a big issue for them. Since they think things through so much, they tend to have plans for themselves. Unexpected visitors throw off their plans, and they may not have the energy to host anyone.

They want to plan for visitors and they have to prepare themselves for the company. It’s a big source of discomfort and annoyance to them when this isn’t how it works out.

14. Their Preferred Method of Communication is Through Writing

They are more comfortable writing their words than speaking them. This is especially true when they haven’t had time to prepare what they are going to say. They like to focus on their words and consider how it sounds, which is only possible through writing.

So while you won’t get many phone calls, expect lots of long text message to keep in touch!

15. They Don’t Answer the Phone

If they don’t recognize the phone number, they won’t ever answer the phone. Sometimes, even when they do recognize the number, they still won’t answer. They don’t like to talk in certain places or situations, so they’ll avoid all phone calls during those times.

Another reason they may avoid phone calls is that it could be interrupting a personal project they are working on. They also won’t answer if they are in a bad mood or thinking something through.

Plus, you have to remember that introverts don’t enjoy small talk. Oftentimes, phone calls require small talk and it makes them feel uncomfortable just thinking about it. To get ahold of them quickly, you will want to send a text message so they know what it’s about.

More to Know About Introversion

There are Different Levels

Not all introverts will exhibit every character trait associated with it. Sometimes they will have a few characteristics that are common to extroversion, but more of the qualities of an introvert. Their characteristics may also change as they grow older and they process things differently.

What Causes Introversion?

While no one is certain about what causes someone to be an introvert or extrovert, there are some ideas. There is some evidence that supports the idea that genetics plays a role in someone’s characteristics. Evidence also shows that it can depend on a person’s childhood and their environment.

Research shows that introverted brains work differently, and these folks have more blood flow to the frontal lobe of their brain. This is the part of the brain that helps with memory, problem-solving, and planning.

Introverted people are also affected by dopamine differently than those who are extroverted. Dopamine is a chemical in the brain that is directly related to pleasure and reward. For introverts, it creates a feeling of exhaustion and stress while extroverts become excited by it.

Final Thoughts on Character Traits That Reveal an Introvert>

Introverts share many of the same character traits, although they may not have all of the traits on this list. Knowing these character traits can help you understand introverts better, allowing you to communicate and interact appropriately.

Although they are much different than extroverts, introverts still like to spend time with extroverts. They enjoy going out once in a while, although they may want to be back home earlier. Even if they love solitude, they will participate in fun events and socialize regularly.

They tend to be more reflective, thoughtful, and loyal. Plus, they seem to love more deeply. If you have an introvert in your life, you should value the relationship and keep them around.

Today’s generation is a tech-savvy one. People are living in an advanced era where doing things manually is no longer part of the trend. While everything now has a touch of automation, Artificial Intelligence holds a very important place for computers and machines in human lives.

Since we are using it in our day-to-day lives, the fact that artificial intelligence is the new upcoming career path cannot be ignored.

Artificial Intelligence in our daily lives: A great helping hands for humans

AI has been used in various sectors to improve efficiency by reducing human effort. Every sector of every industry, worldwide, uses machinery as a part of carrying out everyday work and get things done faster by reducing risks and errors. 

The importance of Artificial intelligence today:

It is used in the banking sector

The banking sector handles various transactions every day which needs proper precision, effort, and time to get things done like investments, stocks, shares, managing properties, and finances. With the help of Artificial intelligence, the process becomes relatively easier to handle. Every customer is now attended and catered to with a quick resolution of their problems. This greatly helps in improving the services provided by the bank.

An important contribution to the field of science

The medical science has evolved a lot after being introduced to AI. With an introduction to virtual assistance, AI has surely increased its value worldwide through online medical attention and by conducting various medical researches and analysis.

There are also provisions of bots that are efficient in answering patient queries anytime.

From fixing appointments to answering queries, AI has led to the evolution of medical science worldwide.

Well-organized use in transportation and heavy industries

AI has helped in shaping various industries like transportation, heavy industries, manufacturing, etc.

With artificial intelligence, companies can efficiently get things done on time. They can easily keep a record of their employees, move shipments from one to another while keeping track of the movement and many other activities.

With accurate data, in hand and well-organised working system, AI makes the transportation industry efficient.

The use of AI in the traveling industry

Traveling industry’s survival without AI is very difficult. With everything being operated online, easy traveling is now on your fingertips. Booking flights, trains, buses, and even autos and taxis are now easy. Hotels and sightseeing can now be booked in advance. Thus, AI has made traveling easy, comfortable, fast, efficient, and safe.

The future of the gaming industry

The gaming industry is not just limited to being a leisure activity, and now with AI, it has revolutionised to a whole new level. It has become a great source of entertainment for this generation.

A bright future ahead

We live in an era where machines are being designed to study the functioning of the human brain. However, it can be very challenging to engineer these technologies into practical use.

Choosing a career path to work in the field of Artificial Intelligence comes with numerous benefits that include treating diseases, better communication all over the world, advanced technology in every sector, designing machines and advancement that can help in accomplishing great things in the future.

Digitalisation and career in AI

Making a career in this field requires qualifying for Artificial Intelligence certification, which can easily be done through institutes that offer online training courses. Thus, you will be able to study at the comfort of your home, which is also another contribution of Artificial Intelligence in the field of education.

Summing up

Artificial Intelligence plays a very important role in the development and growth of the economy by increasing efficiency and reducing human effort. Opening door to many opportunities, AI allows you to work as a software engineer, opt for research jobs, work in robotics, human-machine interfaces, and many more.

Accountability means taking responsibility for your actions and thoughts. It means owning up to it when you have made a mistake. Plus, it means doing what you said you were going to do, and doing what you know needs to be done.

Being accountable is essential for success and living a life that you can be proud of. Whether this is in the workplace, at home, or in your relationships, accountability is essential. Living life this way will raise your self-esteem, allow your relationships to grow, and you’ll make progress toward your goals.

Not only is taking responsibility essential for yourself to, but it is also essential for those around you. It will be a perfect example for others to follow, and they will respect you more. Other people can’t push you to be this way. However, it is all up to you.

Sometimes it may seem easier to let things go or to blame someone else for your mistake. Doing this won’t get you anywhere, however. The next time you feel this way, remember these quotes about accountability, and you’ll feel back on track.

Fifteen Memorable Quotes About Accountability

1. “Be accountable for doing the right things. This means ethical execution of the activities that will actually support the goals you have chosen for yourself.” – Sam Silverstein

As Silverstein explains, as you work your way toward your goals, hold yourself accountable by being ethical. Getting to the top by doing wrong things will not keep you there for long. Plus, it’ll teach people that they shouldn’t trust you.

2. “Blame is the coward’s solution to his fear of accountability.” – Craig D. Lounsbrough

When someone is always blaming someone or something else, they lack responsibility. By taking the cowardly way out of a mistake, they are choosing to hinder their growth.

3. “My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.” – Oprah Winfrey

You know what you should be doing right at this moment. Make sure you are doing the best thing you can that will set you up for the next big thing coming. One step leads to the future, and if they are all reasonable steps, you’ll be successful before you know it.

4. “Accountability separates the wishers in life from the action-takers that care enough about their future to account for their daily actions.” – John Di Lemme

Anyone can wish for a successful and happy future. Only those who hold themselves responsible for it are going to reach their goals, however. You have to be willing to get started and take action if you want to see progress.

This is something that needs to be done daily. Skipping out on what needs doing will only slow you down, whereas action will keep you on the right path.

5. “You are accountable for your actions, your decisions, your life; no one else is, but you.” – Catherine Pulsifer

The things that you do or say are your choices and no one else’s. Each decision you have made is the result of your own decisions, no matter how it turns out. You can’t place the blame on anyone or anything else, as you are the one who holds control of yourself.

6. “It is not only what we do, but also what we do not do, for which we are accountable.” – Moliere

You are responsible for things that didn’t get done, just as you are responsible for things you have done. When someone is counting on you to do something, you have to get it done on time. Otherwise, you won’t be living up to your responsibilities.

7. “People are more inclined to pass the buck than they are to take responsibility. The fact is, though, passing the buck doesn’t build your character or give you the opportunity to learn from your mistakes.” – Marshall Goldsmith

It’s easier to blame others than to admit to mistakes yourself. You can’t learn from your mistakes when you do that, however. It doesn’t give you a chance to grow and learn, and it can diminish your character.

8. “Ninety-nine percent of all failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses.” -George Washington Carver

It can be easy to get in the habit of making excuses. When this happens, you’re excusing yourself for not getting things done that should have been. You are holding yourself back and causing yourself to fail.

9. “In reality, we all have our lives, and the accountability for the achievement of our dreams and goals falls strictly on our own shoulders.” – Thomas Matt

You are responsible for reaching your goals and making your life the way you always dreamed of. No one else can get you there, and no one else can be blamed if you don’t make it. You have to work hard to achieve your dreams, and that means always being responsible.

10. “Accountability is – first and foremost – about being reliable. To get a good picture of your personal accountability, you may want to periodically ask yourself, “Can people count on me to do what I say I’ll do, as I said I would do it?” – Henry J. Evans

When you tell someone you will do something, and you don’t do it, you aren’t reliable. This is something to consider when determining how accountable you are. If you find that people can’t count on you, then you need to work on being reliable all the time.

11. “We are all responsible and accountable for what we do or say even if those behaviors occur in stressful times.” – Byron Pulsifer

You can’t use stress as an excuse to do or say things that you don’t mean. Even in times of stress, you have to take responsibility and make a conscious effort to be a good person.

12. “It is easy to dodge our responsibilities, but we cannot dodge the consequences of dodging our responsibilities.” – Sir Josiah Stamp

If you take the easy way out, you have to accept the consequences of doing so. Whether those consequences are a failure or lack of progress, you have to deal with them no matter what.

If those consequences are something more significant, you still have to deal with that, too. When you think of it that way, it may be easier to just take care of your responsibilities the right direction.

13. “In life, we can have results or reasons. If you are not getting the results you want, your reasons are the lies that you keep telling yourself.” – Harald Anderson

The reasons that Anderson is referring to are just excuses. You can make a change in your life at any time. So, if you aren’t where you want to be, it’s on you, and you have to stop lying to yourself.

14. “Neither age nor experience matters when it comes to being personally accountable for any and all outcomes- no excuses whatsoever- be they positive or negative, nor shifting blame to other people or to external factors.” – Kory Livingstone

No matter how old you are or how experienced you are, you still have to take responsibility for yourself. As Livingstone explains, the outcomes of your decisions are on you, no matter what excuse you come up with. You can’t blame anyone else for what happens in your life, as you are the one in control.

15. “When accountability is present, people keep their eyes on a very clear prize. They know what they are working toward and how they are going to get there.” – Henry J. Evans

You have to know what you are working toward if you want to keep it in mind. Set a goal, even if it is a short-term one, and set your eyes on it. Make decisions every day that will help you get closer to the target.

Once you have achieved it, you can set a new goal for yourself. Or, you could just set one long-term goal and work on making that one. Whichever way you choose to do it, you must keep focused and stay active.

Final Thoughts on Quotes About Accountability Never to Forget

Everything that happens in your life is a direct result of your choices. This is why you must practice accountability every day. Each day when you wake up, you have to decide to take a step toward your goals.

If you do this, you will be sure to be successful in your endeavors. By taking responsibility for your life, you are ensuring no one else can mess things up for you. Placing blame on other people or events doesn’t help you reach your goals as it slows your growth.

Be responsible and do what needs to be done, and you can be sure to head down the right path. Remember these quotes the next time you feel like taking the easy way out, and you’ll be sure to hold yourself accountable instead.

Two of the most difficult words to say are “I’m sorry.” Why is it so hard for some people to admit when they’re wrong? Giving an apology is good for the soul. It’s a way for you to get the forgiveness you need and move forward in your relationship. It takes something negative and brings it into a positive light.

You’re human, and when a situation becomes intense, it’s reasonable to say and do things that you don’t really mean. You say something in the heat of the moment that you wouldn’t usually say. Sadly, you hurt others either by accident or intentionally. Thankfully, you come to your senses and realize that you must say you’re sorry for the pain that you have caused someone.

You Must Be Regretful for Your Actions

How often have you heard a mother of father tell a child to apologize when they’ve done something wrong? The child grumbles out a halfhearted, “I’m sorry,” even though they didn’t mean a word of it. These kinds of apologies won’t work for an adult.

People want to see that you regret your actions and that you can move past this moment and onto greener pastures. The goal is to restore trust and not make this person an enemy. You need to offer an apology that is not only restorative but sincere. How can you accomplish this and not come off as that child who is being forced into this situation?

Some People Aren’t Ready to Forgive

When someone is hurt, their anger takes over, and their thoughts become irrational. Think of it the same way that your anger clouded your judgment, and you said and did things that got you into this predicament in the first place. The individual you hurt might not be so eager to forgive or even hear your apology.

You learned from a child that you need to apologize, but just because you know that you’re doing the right thing doesn’t make it easier. The person you offended could be angry and may harbor resentment against you, so they may not be ready to hear what you have to say.

Since you’ve overstepped your bounds, they may wonder if what you’re saying is even the truth. They may doubt your apology and your sincerity. The key element to genuinely extending or accepting an apology is purpose.

Some may find it hard to forgive you based on what was done, and even if they do exonerate you, they won’t forget the action. You may not deserve forgiveness, but it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do the right thing.

Apologizing Releases the Burden from You

Apologizing to someone releases the pain and burden from you and puts the ball in their court. If they refuse forgiveness, then it will hurt them in the long run? You did your part to release the burden of guilt from your shoulders.

If they don’t forgive you, then they allow a black cloud to hang over them. Unforgiveness is like looking through dark glasses filled with anger and bitterness. If you’re the one who needs to apologize, don’t let your pride stand in your way.

Seven Tips to Saying “I’m Sorry”

You need to right the wrong that was done as it speaks highly of your character. Did you know that there are seven tips that can help you apologize and with sincerity? Here are e, according to relationship experts.

1. Get an Approval Before You Apologize

It may sound silly to ask someone’s permission to seek forgiveness, but it’s the right thing to do. The person you wronged may not want to hear you saying I’m sorry, and they may not be at the place to move on. Some people need time and space to cool off.

You really must factor in what was done and the person who you wronged. Some people are eager to accept forgiveness and move past the deed, but others can hold grudges for years. Essentially, timing is everything. The goal is to make sure that the person you apologize to is at the place to receive it.

2. Show Sincerity That You Hurt Them

Part of asking for forgiveness is recognizing what you did was wrong and being regretful for your actions. You want to convey that you wish you could take back what you said or did to hurt them.

Try not to say use the word “if” in the apology. When you sound unsure whether you hurt them or not, then you leave things open to interpretation. You don’t want to shift any blame to the other person, but you should take responsibility for your actions in full.

3. Make Affirmative Actions for Change

Once you’ve crossed a line, it’s not always easy to go backward. For instance, if you had an affair, there’s really is no way to go back and change what you did. The only way you can move is forward.

You can explain your actions, but even if you do everything that you can to make it right, it may not be enough. Speak your peace and let the other party choose the outcome.

Let’s assume that you forgot to report tips at work, and your boss caught you. You can ask for forgiveness for your wrongdoing, but he still must fire you for theft. It doesn’t mean that you still don’t owe him an apology.

If they don’t forgive you, then it’s on them. You may be remorseful for your actions, but sometimes the deed is so severe that there is no way to recover from it. Still, it’s always a good character to make a sincere apology.

4. Make Sure They Know You Won’t Do This Again

In the scenario where you’re in trouble at work, part of reconciling with your boss is to let him know that you will never fail to report your tips again. The boss may show you mercy because you were sincere, or they may stick to company policy.

Your attitude can help predict the outcome. The person you apologize to can feel your sincerely, and your demeanor may choose whether they forgive you or not. Keep in mind that forgiveness doesn’t always mean there are no consequences for your actions.

If you apologize to a judge for going 25 miles per hour over the speed limit, he will probably still punish you. However, he may go lighter on you in the hopes that you learned your lesson and won’t do it again.

5. Give a Formal Invitation to Ask for Forgiveness

When asking for forgiveness, you must say the words “My friend, I am so sorry for what I have done. Will you please forgive me?” You may say a lot of other things as you apologize.

The most important thing is asking for their forgiveness. Don’t just assume they will extend the olive branch to you, ask, and make sure that you settle this matter.

6. Do a Follow Up Act

While your words are fitly spoken when you’ve hurt someone, you need to follow up your meeting with a consolation gift. You should send something that shows this person that you meant what you said. Things you could send include a card, flowers, email, or a special “just because” gift.

While you don’t have to spend any money or do another thing, it once again shows your sincerity and devotion to making a change. The gesture serves as a promissory note that you won’t make the same mistake twice.

7. Move on From the Past

If you have apologized for your actions and this individual has forgiven you, then it’s time to move on. Don’t dwell in the past as it can dictate your future. For instance, if you lied to your spouse and got caught, they can’t continually throw this up in your face.

When you have asked forgiveness, if they accept, then they must genuinely forgive. While forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting, it does mean moving on from this event. It’s never fun to be with someone who is continuously bringing up all your wrongdoings in an argument. They may have said that they forgave you, but their actions speak so much louder than their words.

Final Thoughts: Don’t Ruin Your Apology by Making Excuses

Don’t expect things to get right back to normal. In many instances, it takes time to heal the issues even though they did accept your act of contrition. If done correctly, this event can allow your relationship to grow.

When you weather a few storms, you will have to apologize for anything you’ve done wrong. These life lessons cause you to have a deeper level of respect for people. You can truly show how much you care for someone by your willingness to make things right.

Just remember that you must stick to the facts and never make excuses for your actions. The goal of apologizing is to get forgiveness and not prove your case.

You will make many apologies in life, but with each one counts as a lesson learned about how you should act and treat people. Saying I’m sorry should come naturally if you live with integrity.

We often think of being stubborn as a negative trait, but being a little hard-headed comes in handy sometimes. It helps you stand your ground and not give in to people out of peer pressure or guilt. It does pay to compromise in certain situations, but you also have to know when to stand firm with people.

No matter how you feel about stubbornness, new research shows that this personality trait might actually help you live longer! A study by the University of California San Diego School of Medicine and the University of Rome La Sapienza sought to find a connection between certain personality traits and longevity.  Twenty-nine individuals aged 90-101 from remote rural villages in Italy participated in the study. At the conclusion of the study, the scientists confirmed that the group had better mental health overall than their younger family members aged 51-75, even though their physical health was worse.

The group had a few key traits in common, including a stubborn streak, a hearty work ethic, healthy relationships with family, an optimistic attitude, and a life close to nature. Researchers believe that being stubborn helped participants care less about what others thought of them, which in turn lowered their mental stress. This mental fortitude and unyielding disposition aided them greatly in keeping a positive outlook on life.

“We also found that this group tended to be domineering, stubborn, and needed a sense of control…” study co-author Anna Scelzo stated in a press release from UC San Diego Health,

“This tendency to control the environment suggests notable grit that is balanced by a need to adapt to changing circumstances.”

So, as you can see, being stubborn does pay off! Below, we’ll go over some of the critical traits of a stubborn person. Because having a lot of pride does come with its downsides. Thus, we will talk about some of the challenges stubborn people face as well.

“You don’t stay undefeated without being a little stubborn.” ~Andre Ward

Psychology reveals seven traits of a stubborn person:

1. They have a strong will.

Stubborn people never hesitate to follow through with something they genuinely believe in. If they have a vision, they will accomplish their goals, come hellfire, or high water. This mental vigor pays off because you can’t reach your destination if you have fears about even leaving the driveway. In other words, having pride enables you to stay consistent with your dreams and keep the momentum going even when you reach setbacks.

Having a strong will may come from facing challenging situations in childhood. People who have a lot of struggles early on in life may have a greater appreciation for hard work and will walk the extra mile to achieve their dreams. Those who have nothing to lose and everything to gain know all too well how it feels to stare up that mountain from the very bottom. However, the climb makes the journey worth it.

Those who have unshakable willpower don’t let life stand in their way, and they don’t cave easily under pressure. This segues into our next point.

2. Stubborn people have a lot of resilience.

Those who have a lot of pride feel that they must do everything on their own. Nothing got handed to them in life, and they know if they want something, they will have to work for it. However, no challenge intimidates or scares away a stubborn person. They have the drive and indomitable will to shape reality how they see fit.

They will work 16 hour days if they have to in order to accomplish their goals. A stubborn person may seem intimidating when you first meet them, but they don’t allow others’ opinions to ruffle their feathers. They have much larger fish to fry, so they just keep their eyes on the prize.

3. They won’t sway their opinion just because of peer pressure.

A stubborn person won’t cave in an argument just because no one agrees with them. They’ll make their points, have evidence to back them up, and stand their ground even if no one stands with them. While some people will just go with the herd because it feels comfortable, a person with pride doesn’t let the groupthink mentality affect them.

No matter the topic, stubborn people bring a lot of fire to a discussion, expanding the minds of everyone in the room. Although, they sometimes have a difficult time admitting when they’re wrong, so it doesn’t always go both ways. Their inflexible personality can often cause disharmony in the lives of stubborn people because they don’t like to admit defeat or error.

If they can keep an open mind during discussions, it will help them greatly in both the workplace and their home life.

4. Stubborn people have a passionate attitude about life.

Because stubborn people don’t like to back down from a challenge, they have a lot of passion and vigor for life. Nothing seems off-limits or impossible for them because of their willpower and determination to get things done. Stubborn people often excel in the following careers due to their hard-headed disposition, according to research from study.com:

• wholesale and manufacturing sales representative
• retail sales worker
• management analyst
• human resources manager
• police officer

These jobs require a lot of social interaction, but they also cater to people who have a lot of pride in their skills and ability to accomplish a task. For these reasons, you might consider careers in these fields if you have a particular personality type.

5. They usually have a good work ethic.

Stubborn people have high standards for themselves and enjoy getting the job done, no matter what it might entail. They typically do better working alone because of their sometimes combative nature, but if they can tone it down a notch, working in groups doesn’t present a problem. Having pride in one’s work only becomes a problem when people trample on others or don’t consider their opinions.

So, if the person in question can learn to listen attentively to others and try to understand their perspective, they will have no trouble working in a group setting. Being stubborn can sometimes pay off when working with others because these types of people have a willingness to do tedious tasks that others may cringe at.

6. They may resist change.

Stubborn people often have excellent resistance to change because they like to follow the status quo. Because of this inflexibility, this might just be their downfall. Life changes constantly, so it pays to have an open mind and a willingness to go with the flow. Stubborn people will have to work on their rigid way of living if they want to reach their potential truly.

7. Stubborn people sometimes like to argue to prove a point.

Not backing down in a discussion is one thing, but having a lot of pride sometimes means instigating arguments just for the sake of it. Stubborn people have an insatiable need to be right, and they see arguing as a fun pastime. Beware if you cross a stubborn person with a lot of time on their hands because they might just start hitting you with heavy topics, like religion, politics, or gun control.

They may not mean to cause any discord, but they genuinely see discussions as a means of expanding one’s mind and seeing the world from another perspective. So, they may not realize they’re overstepping boundaries if others don’t enjoy arguing as they do. Perhaps they’d enjoy a career as a lawyer for this reason as well because a right amount of debating goes on in the courtroom.

Ways to deal with a stubborn person:

• Walk away for a bit to breathe. Sometimes, you just need some space to cool off before you can deal with any problems. If the two of you just can’t see eye-to-eye, you might want to walk away before things get too heated. This way, you can circle back to the issue with a clear head.
• Try to understand their side. Perhaps they’ve had to defend themselves from a young age and just don’t know how to communicate well. Try to understand where they’re coming from before writing them off as merely impossible to deal with.
• Attempt to compromise. Stubborn people and compromise don’t usually appear in the same sentence. However, any rational, mature person would want to see things from another’s perspective. Try to arrive at a middle ground with them, as long as they seem open to discussing it.

Final thoughts on traits of a stubborn person

If you have a stubborn person in your life, you know the difficulties you face in dealing with them. They may seem argumentative and stuck in their ways, but they have their positive traits as well. Being stubborn means not backing down from challenges, having a strong work ethic, standing up for yourself, and having a lot of passion. These traits can take someone far in life as long as their hardheadedness doesn’t get the best of them.

You probably don’t sit around thinking much about death. Not many people do. But some nurses come face to face with death every day. They hear a great deal of dying people’s regrets. Rarely do nurses hear a dying person express sorrow over their living room color choices or the kind of car they drove. Their deathbed regrets are usually closer to the heart than this.

Hospice workers are often the last people to interact with the dying in their final moments. Here, hospice nurses reveal some of the musings of people who are making that transition.

What are the Top 5 Regrets People Make on Their Deathbed?

Here are some of the revelations that people make as they slip from the universe and into their next destination.

1 – Dying people have family regrets

One of the top regrets expressed by people on their deathbeds has to do with their family members. Dying people frequently wish they had spent more time with their kids, or their wife, or their siblings or their parents.

According to palliative care nurse Bonnie Ware, they wish they spent more of their time on family vacations instead of working all the time. They wish they had gone to visit their siblings in another state instead of making the excuse that it was too far away. These regrets are heartbreaking because many times, the people who need to hear these expressed regrets aren’t around anymore.  Or if they are still around, by now, the relationships are so broken that these last-minute regrets sound hollow to them. Family relationships are always messy, but when you don’t value your family, it gets even messier, and it ends up in endless regrets.

Lesson learned:

The take away from this regret, of course, is that you don’t need to end up with these regrets on your death bed. Learn from what nurses say is the most common regret shared by their dying patients. Value your family, take time off work to go on that family vacation or to play with your kids.

Visit your siblings in another state, even if it’s expensive and inconvenient. Be the one who initiates instead of waiting for the other person. Give your family your time and energy now while you still can so that in the end, you will have a free and clear conscience. You won have regrets because you did the best you could to make your family feel loved by you.

2 – People on their deathbed wish they had been a better person

It’s often not until it’s too late that people wish they had been nicer people. It’s weird how they don’t think about it until it’s really too late to do anything. Perhaps they wish they’d been a kinder, more patient, and more loving person.  They may apologize for their bad behavior towards their kids or wife for their failures. It brings them peace knowing their family heard their confession, but for the family, it’s often too little, too late. The years of being kinder, patient, and gentle are lost.

Some dying patients also express that they listened to their doctor and followed better health habits before it became too late. Nurse Jaime Lynn notes on Quora that this regret is prevalent among drug addicts and alcoholics in their final hours.

Lesson learned:

You never hear someone complain about their parent or spouse being too kind or too loving. “If my wife would just stop being such a caring person, I’d be much happier in my marriage,” will never be said. Sadly, you typically hear the opposite being said.  It’s never too late to begin being the kindest, most loving person you can be. Today could be the day you begin to love your family members more.  Perhaps you need to apologize to someone. Today is as ideal a day as any to do it. Don’t wait until you’re dying to say you love your kids or wife.

3 – People wish they had taken more risks

Hospice advocate Jaime Garrison mentions on Quora that some patients on their deathbed express regret over the things they didn’t do.

As people age, they often reminisce about what their life could have been. What f they had taken that overseas job, or went to medical school? They have lots of time to sit around to think and to wish they’d done some things differently. They regret not making some decisions.

Maybe they were dissuaded by their parents, who thought that risk-taking wasn’t wise. Or they were afraid of the unknown. These regrets are heard by nurses all the time. It’s sad because there’s nothing to be said except to reassure the dying person that they did their best they could at the time. No one gets a second go-around in life; no one gets a do-over.

Lesson learned:

It’s hard to know when you’re in the middle of making a decision whether you will wish you’d done things differently later on.  You weigh all the options, but making decisions isn’t a clear cut process every time. All you can do is to decide what seems right at the moment. If you’re making your decisions based on what you see and feel is right at the moment, you shouldn’t feel regret.

Evaluate your decision-making process. Are there things you’re not doing because of fear of taking a risk? Is there something you’d like to learn or do, but you’ve been putting it off? Take a tip from these dying people’s regrets. Don’t wait until it’s too late.  Do that thing you’ve been dreaming about.  If you fail, so what? Failure is not the worst thing that can happen in your life. Don’t be afraid to take risks. You will be glad you did when you’re older. You don’t want to be that person on your death bed full of regrets about all the what-ifs in your life.

4 – They missed opportunities to express their feelings

Drying people frequently have loose tongues. All at once, they are open about their feelings as well as regrets. Perhaps it’s their medication doing it,  but they suddenly wish they’d expressed their pent-up feelings to their loved ones. Sometimes people fear being honest with their family members, or they just don’t know how to express themselves. Some people are raised to keep feelings inside.

Whatever the reason, deathbeds are like confessionals. The dying have important things they want to say, and oftentimes, it’s just the nurses around to hear them. They want to share all the things they neglected to say for decades. Nurses can comfort these patients by telling them they did the best they could. But this won’t erase their regrets.

Lesson learned: 

It’s always better to say something than to hold your feelings inside. Not being honest about your feelings never helps anyone. Honestly, sharing your feelings doesn’t give you a license to vent your anger at people. It simply means you honestly but gently share how you honestly feel.

Maybe you’ve been disappointed that your friends or family didn’t support you through an especially difficult time in your life. Or perhaps there is someone in your life who you appreciate, but you’ve never expressed it to them to their face. Being open about your feelings can result in deeper, stronger relationships with people. Don’t wait until you are on your deathbed! Go ahead and express your feelings now.

5 – People on their deathbed wish they could offer forgiveness of an old wrong

People often carry old grievances well into their elderly years. Injustices, whether real or perceived by family members or friends, embitter their hearts and minds. It’s often not until they become sick on their deathbeds that they begin to view these grievances in a new light. Maybe cutting off that relationship wasn’t worth the pain? What if they had forgiven that person? Would they feel this regret?

Lesson learned:

Nurses say that dying patients say time and again that they wished they had forgiven someone. It’s one of the top five regrets these nurses hear. The lesson here, of course, is to consider your own relationships. Is there a person or people you need to forgive? Could you take the first step in healing a broken friendship? We can all learn from dying people’s regrets about forgiveness. You can work hard not to have this same kind of regret in your life.

Final Thoughts on Learning Lessons from People on Their Deathbeds

Rarely do you hear that someone’s dying regrets had anything to do with what their house looked like or what kind of clothes they wore? The importance of material things fades away when you are close to death. You have regrets about people in your life, rather than the things in your life. Your lingering thoughts and regrets drift to how you lived your life and who you loved and cared for.

The lesson learned from this list of five regrets is that life is short. Love your family and those around you the best you can. Take risks when appropriate; don’t fear failing.

Be a forgiving, kindhearted person. No one will ever complain about that. And last of all, say what you’re feeling instead of repressing it. Be generous in sharing your feelings of love and care for people. You’ll never have regrets about that.

The lessons learned from these dying patents’ lips should motivate you in how you live your life so that someday when you are in their position, you’ll be regret-free.